Funny sayings about wheeling/engines [Archive] - FSB Forums

: Funny sayings about wheeling/engines


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Blown
01-08-2004, 12:01 PM
d

BlackSunshine
01-08-2004, 12:32 PM
Know it's kinda old....but I've seen this one alot

http://home.mindspring.com/~ontheturningaway/FLIP.JPG

SMOOTH
01-08-2004, 12:38 PM
"Just use more stupid pedal!"

"Hang On! I saw this in a movie once!"

BlackSunshine
01-08-2004, 12:40 PM
"Why do people always hit the brakes when flying off a cliff?" "Hope they have airbrakes"

Blown
01-08-2004, 12:49 PM
Ya baby ya, keep em coming! :histerica

"I'd rather be in this heep, than another creep in a jeep!"

(Can substitute sheep for creep) :beer

BlackSunshine
01-08-2004, 06:33 PM
Sorry Chevy...the heartbeat just flatlined

BlackSunshine
01-08-2004, 06:35 PM
Hmmm<killing brain cells trying to make up new ones here>

How about "If Chevy's are like a rock...Ford is the paper"

Blown
01-08-2004, 09:33 PM
Ford, The heart break of chevrolet!

Anyone else gonna play!

Tomh971
01-08-2004, 09:42 PM
The Stampede is louder than the heartbeat..."

Eatin' chevies and shittin' dodge...

Only little boys play with bowties

drive it like you don't own it




:rockon hmmm...

/==0=\
01-08-2004, 09:44 PM
I've got this one on my truck "Mud on the tires, Rocks in the head"

reptillikus
01-08-2004, 11:01 PM
Saw a sticker on a heep that i wanna get for my 2 trucks in the near future. It reads:

WARNING:
Insanity has replaced reason in the modification of this vehicle

:toothless

DeepSeaSnake
01-09-2004, 12:52 AM
when I used to surf the HEEP forums there were a couple of guys with windshield decals that said:

H2 recovery team

as soon as I mount a winch Im gonna rock one

Blown
01-09-2004, 10:54 AM
I like Jeeps, Mmmmm taste like chicken! :thumbup

OldBlue
01-09-2004, 10:58 AM
if chevys are like a rock, why would you want to own something that doesnt even move.

arkansawer
01-09-2004, 12:39 PM
CHEVY sink in the mud LIKE A ROCK

BlackSunshine
01-09-2004, 04:45 PM
I believe I saw these on the back of arkansawer's ride....

"If the trucks a rockin'...don't come a knockin' My cousin and I are busy"
:beer

"If you can't keep it in the pants, keep it in the family"

"Nothing says lovin like porking your own cousin"

"I have all these bumper stickers & can't read a single one"

:chili: :chili: :chili:

Marauder
01-09-2004, 04:53 PM
lol those are just awful but hilarious!

southrncomfort
01-09-2004, 06:44 PM
chevy, like a rock, it won't budge

gearrat
01-09-2004, 08:52 PM
keep honking i'm reloading

caution driver only carries 30 dollars in ammo

90bronconate
01-10-2004, 12:43 AM
on an old beat to hell f-150 - my treasure is in heaven hehe :angel

OL' HANK
01-10-2004, 02:46 PM
me and a buddy sang this to a guy " like a rock, as stuck as you can be " while pulling him and his chevy out of the mud. He didn't like that one as much as we did. :histerica

BlackSunshine
01-10-2004, 06:26 PM
me and a buddy sang this to a guy " like a rock, as stuck as you can be " while pulling him and his chevy out of the mud. He didn't like that one as much as we did. :histerica

Sorry to kill the thread for a second....

I have to admit. Generally speaking, I'm a die-hard GM fan. Out of the several K5's I have owned in the past though, Ford has really impressed me with the cross between comfort and ruggedness.

<peeling all his piss on Ford stickers off his Trans Am>

WES
01-10-2004, 07:17 PM
FORD OFF-ROAD
If its not a FORD you either have to DODGE it on the trail, or pull it out cause it sunk LIKE A ROCK

saw that on some guys rockcrawler.com readers ride thing, liked it and use it all the time now

wes

BlackSunshine
01-10-2004, 08:03 PM
how about infamous acronyms?

Pontiac - Poor Old ****** Thinks Its A Cadillac
KIA - Killed In Action (Actually Military)
Ford - Found On The Road Dead/Fix Or Repair Daily/****ed Over Rebuilt Dodge
Chevy - Cheapest Heap Ever enVisioned Yet
Buick - Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
Saab - Something An Asshole Bought
Dodge - Dear Old Dad's Garage Experiment
Jeep - Just Empty Every Pocket
Honda - Had One, Never Drove Again
Hyundai - Hope You Understand Nothing is Driveable AND Inexpensive
Mopar - Mostly Old Parts And Rust
GM - Girly Man

arkansawer
01-12-2004, 12:41 AM
I believe I saw these on the back of arkansawer's ride....

"If the trucks a rockin'...don't come a knockin' My cousin and I are busy"
:beer

"If you can't keep it in the pants, keep it in the family"

"Nothing says lovin like porking your own cousin"

"I have all these bumper stickers & can't read a single one"

:chili: :chili: :chili:


:toothless :histerica :histerica :histerica

I have to admit those were good...... BUT thats not what your mom AND sister was saying friday night. Oh and tell them thanks for the deal, buy one get one free, but im still waiting for my change from that dollar. :histerica

:beer

arkansawer
01-12-2004, 12:41 AM
FORD.... First On Race Day

gearrat
01-12-2004, 12:53 AM
DODGE = dead on delivery go easy

Ironclad
01-12-2004, 09:16 AM
The original ads for Broncos back in the 60's included, Ford - Found Off Road Daily and Fun Off Road Driving.

bnkrtstk
01-12-2004, 10:21 AM
I'd rather push my Ford than drive a Chevy.

On a quiet night in the country, you can hear a Chevy rust.

BlackSunshine
01-12-2004, 11:20 AM
:toothless :histerica :histerica :histerica

I have to admit those were good...... BUT thats not what your mom AND sister was saying friday night. Oh and tell them thanks for the deal, buy one get one free, but im still waiting for my change from that dollar. :histerica

:beer

I think what you were trying to say was "that's not what your mom AND sister WERE saying Friday night.

You know, your comments would be so much more amusing if you weren't home schooled in the back of your mother's trailer. Now hush before I fill up the tires on it and haul your entire home into a lake trailer boy.

arkansawer
01-12-2004, 12:28 PM
As long as i have your sister and mother with me, i should be fine. You are forgetting one thing. A yankee entering redneck country where everyone has a trailer, so how are u going to find mine? :histerica

k1w1t1m
01-12-2004, 12:38 PM
Chevy.... like a rock! Straight down

stangmata
01-12-2004, 02:41 PM
Fiat- Fix It Again Tony

BlackSunshine
01-12-2004, 06:15 PM
As long as i have your sister and mother with me, i should be fine. You are forgetting one thing. A yankee entering redneck country where everyone has a trailer, so how are u going to find mine? :histerica

Hmm...do you people down there ever get any new material? I gave up the whole "momma" joke routine about 6-7 years ago. Anyways, I thought about this and realized that by me tipping over your home, or pulling it in a lake, I would be doing nothing. Your life can't get much more pathetic than it already is (short of third-world living). So I will just let you sit there and tell yourself that you will someday be better than a poorly scripted Jerry Springer episode. Hell, without people like yourself, the show COPS wouldn't be as much fun to watch right?

arkansawer
01-12-2004, 11:01 PM
Dude im probably better off then you'll ever be in your entire life. So get off your high horse and take a dam joke, lol. You think i went low by doing a momma joke, well same with you with the redneck joke. Its old stuff man get over it. I tell ya what, if u wanna fight ....... shove your head up my arse and fight for air :histerica

bnkrtstk
01-13-2004, 07:52 AM
Dude im probably better off then you'll ever be in your entire life. So get off your high horse and take a dam joke, lol. You think i went low by doing a momma joke, well same with you with the redneck joke. Its old stuff man get over it. I tell ya what, if u wanna fight ....... shove your head up my arse and fight for air :histerica


This is getting good, hey ma get the Bud and pork rinds they's gonna fight! :toothless

Fireguy50
01-13-2004, 07:57 AM
"Silly Rabit, Jeeps are for Girls!"

BlackSunshine
01-13-2004, 10:08 AM
Dude im probably better off then you'll ever be in your entire life. So get off your high horse and take a dam joke, lol. You think i went low by doing a momma joke, well same with you with the redneck joke. Its old stuff man get over it. I tell ya what, if u wanna fight ....... shove your head up my arse and fight for air :histerica

Dude, I'm probably better off than you'll ever be in your entire life.

How's that? At 25, I own a 3 story home on the far northwest side of Chicago. (Check the prices around here, there isn't a home under 270,000).

I drive my 94 Bronco,2001 Eldo STS,69 Goat,and my 85 Trans Am, AND have the garage space to put them in (minus the Bronco).

I work for Cook Cty. State Attorney's Office and am working towards a Masters in poli-sci. My "high horse" is comfortable...I think I'll stay here awhile ;-) Now, maybe you "Arkansas'rs" like having heads stuck up their rears...but here in Chicago, we usually just kick the hell out of you.

arkansawer
01-13-2004, 01:10 PM
Well lets see, at 23 i own 2 subway restauraunts, and working on my third. I live in a 2000 sq ft home with 100 acres, i have a 40x60 shop. I own 25 beef cattle. I drive a 90 bronco eddie bauer, a 2004 F150, an 1100 honda saber, and working on finding a model A.

The only thing good that has ever came out of shitcago is Al Capone.

bnkrtstk
01-13-2004, 01:56 PM
Wait let me go get my measuring tape.

:goodfinge

stangmata
01-13-2004, 01:59 PM
Wait let me go get my measuring tape.

:goodfinge

you're having too much fun with this :toothless

bnkrtstk
01-13-2004, 02:09 PM
you're having too much fun with this :toothless

:brownbag

BlackSunshine
01-13-2004, 02:34 PM
:banghead

Only thing good that came out of Arkansas was


Um



Hmmm


Nevermind

Tomh971
01-13-2004, 03:02 PM
Car
Has
Every
Valve
Rattle
Or
Leak
Every
Trip


:D

stangmata
01-13-2004, 03:04 PM
Car
Has
Every
Valve
Rattle
Or
Leak
Every
Trip


:D

Finally!! I've never heard one for Chevrolet before!! Also, its good to break the chain between the inbred and the fruitcake :toothless

bnkrtstk
01-13-2004, 03:56 PM
Poor
Old
N-word
Thinks
It's
A
Cadillac

arkansawer
01-13-2004, 05:47 PM
Finally!! I've never heard one for Chevrolet before!! Also, its good to break the chain between the inbred and the fruitcake :toothless


:histerica U crack me up stang

arkansawer
01-13-2004, 05:49 PM
Has anyone ever came up with something for any imports?

stangmata
01-13-2004, 06:05 PM
how about infamous acronyms?

Pontiac - Poor Old ****** Thinks Its A Cadillac
KIA - Killed In Action (Actually Military)
Saab - Something An Asshole Bought
Honda - Had One, Never Drove Again
Hyundai - Hope You Understand Nothing is Driveable AND Inexpensive


Sure have...you just need to R-E-A-D.

You southerners :slap

:histerica :histerica ....it's a joke folks!

Jayrus
01-13-2004, 07:27 PM
Move Over People Are Racing.

arkansawer
01-13-2004, 07:45 PM
Well i was talking more on the line of nissan or toyota, but those will work :toothless

stangmata
01-14-2004, 07:53 AM
Well i was talking more on the line of nissan or toyota, but those will work :toothless

Needs Insestual Side Sex from Arkansas Nephew :toothless

arkansawer
01-14-2004, 02:27 PM
:histerica that was pretty good, but id prefer the niece over the nephew :toothless

stangmata
01-14-2004, 02:44 PM
:histerica that was pretty good, but id prefer the niece over the nephew :toothless

Dude, a jokes a joke and then you go too far. SICKO! :wacko


hahahhaa :goodfinge

SUPERJUNK
01-14-2004, 07:39 PM
Here is my favorite,Found Off Road Drunk :beer

Tomh971
01-15-2004, 07:08 AM
Hey Stang... here ya go man...

Camaro:
Can A Mechanic Actually Repair One??
Can't America Make A Real One?
Chevrolet Assembled Mustang And Repaired Often
Could Always Manufacture And Recall Often

CHEVROLET:
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cracked Heads, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time
Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering Techniques
Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

GM:
General Maintenance
Great Mistake
Garbage Motors
Generally Miserable
Grossly Misconceived
Gluteus Maximus
Good Money
Goofy's Manufacturing
Gone Mental


GMC:
Grief & Misery Combined
Garage Man's Companion
Gotta Mechanic Coming?
Generally Mediocre Cars
Get More Chicks
Gets Mechanics Crazy
Gods Mechanical Curse
Got More Crap
Great Mountain Climber
Great Motor Car
God Made Chevy
Good Moron Car
Got Mine Cheap
Get My Checkbook
Gone Mad Corp.

HYUNDAI: Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...

JEEP:
Just Eats Every Part
Just Empty Every Pocket
Junk Engineering Executed Poorly
Jumps Extremely Excitedly over Potholes
Jinxed Engine has Extra Parts


These should hold y'all over for a few minutes... LOL


:wacko :histerica :rebelflag :wacko :goodfinge

stangmata
01-15-2004, 08:37 AM
Hey Stang... here ya go man...

Camaro:
Chevrolet Assembled Mustang And Repaired Often
Could Always Manufacture And Recall Often

CHEVROLET:
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering Techniques
Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

GM:
General Maintenance
Goofy's Manufacturing


GMC:
Gotta Mechanic Coming?
Gods Mechanical Curse

HYUNDAI: Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...


:histerica :histerica :histerica :histerica I'm going to have to write those down. Thanks! :beer

Ian

Tomh971
01-15-2004, 09:37 AM
no sweat bro...

Pony-boy
01-17-2004, 07:31 AM
On my back bumper I have a tiny sticker that is upside down that says


ALTERNATE POSITION

/==0=\
01-17-2004, 05:04 PM
Like a Rock... Found on the side of roads everywhere :thumbup

I like my truck, it's big and white... just like me :rockon :rebelflag

origin
01-17-2004, 06:29 PM
Acura - Apparently Cheap U-joints Replaced Again
MDX - My Driveshaft Xploded

AM General - Apparently My Girth Enables Neophytes to End Rollovers At Last
Hummer - Huge Unwieldy Monster Mashes Every Rock

Asuna - Annoyingly Slow Under Normal Acceleration

BMW - Break My Windows / Bought My Wife

Buick - Butt-Ugly Imitation Cadillac Kitsch
Rendezvous - Roads Easily Negotiated Demand Extra Zeal; Vibration Overwhelms Unsuspecting Simpleton

Cadillac - Crashed After Driver Intercepted Low-Level Air Craft
Escalade - Embarrassed Stockbrokers Can Always Lie About Dead Electronics

Chevrolet - Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Avalanche - After Victims Acquire Lease, Annoying Noises Constantly Heard Everywhere
Blazer - Bought Lemon; A Zillion Electrical Recalls
Silverado - Seized Injectors Lack Velocity; Exciting Roll Abruptly Detains Owner
Suburban - Stretched Useless Blazer Uses Rusty Bolts And Nails
Tahoe - Total Amateur Hates Onerous Electronics / Take A Hike, Or Else

Daihatsu - Damages Axles In Highly Advanced Technical Situations, Unfortunately
Rocky - Rolled Over Cliff; Keep Yanking

Dodge - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Dakota - Damned Amateurs, Keep Out of Tough Areas
Durango - Drives Unusually Rough And Never Goes Offroad
Ram - Replace All Motors / Really Awful Mechanicals
Ramcharger - Radiator And Motor Can't Handle A Relatively Gentle Easy Road

Ford - Forget Off Road Driving / Found On Rocks Disabled / Flip Over, Read Directions / or upside down: Driver Returns On Foot / Damaging Rust Overwhelms Frame
Bronco - Body Rust Overwhelms New Car Owner
Escape - Easy Sidehills Can Alter People's Expectations
Excursion - Expansive Xenophiliac's Cursed Urban Ride Slowly Impairs Owner's Neurons
Expedition - Exorbitant Xeroxed Product Embarrasses Driver Incessantly; Tow It Out Now
Explorer - Expansive Xeric Pastures Leave Our Ride Easily Rolled
Ranger - Retarded Accelleration Needlessly Gets Engine Roaring / Reverse And Neutral Gears Explode Rapidly
Message to Ford Motors: Stop using the letter "x", I'm running out of words!!

Geo - Gross Exhaust Odour
Tracker - Tough Road Action Creates Knocking Engine Rods

GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming? / Get My Come-along / Garbage Master Cylinder / or upside down: Couldn't Make the Grade / Corroding in My Garage
Denali - Docile Engine Needs A Little Injection
Envoy - Expensive New Vehicle Of Yuppies
Jimmy - Jump Into My Mother's Yacht
Sonoma - Suddenly Overturned Near Old Mainline Access
Yukon - Yelling Usually Keeps Owners Nonviolent

Holden - High Output Lights Drain Energy Notoriously
Frontera - Frightening Roll-Over Necessitates Training; Engine Rattles
Annoyingly
Jackaroo - Junky Air Conditioning Keeps All Registered Owners Oblivous

Honda - Had One, Never Did Again
CRV - Crappy Recalled Vehicle / Crying Reveals Victim
Pilot - Painfully Inadequate Loser Overturns Truck

Hyundai - Help! Yells Unimpressed Newbie, Disappointed After Introduction
Santa Fe - Sluggish Automobile Notoriously Tepid And Fools Everyone / Sad Attempt Not Too Advanced, Fails Early

Isuzu - It Slowly Undermines Ziebart's Undercoating
Amigo - Aliens Might Investigate Grabbing One
Rodeo - Rides On Dry Earth Only
Trooper - Towing Recommended Out Of Pitifully Easy Rocks
Vehicross - Very Easy Hill Invites Crazy Roll Over Side Slopes

Jeep - Just Enough Extra Parts / Jinxed Engine Eats Pistons / Jerks Exploring Every Pasture / Joke Electronics Exceptionally Poor / Just Empty Every Pocket
CJ - Cheap Junk / Children's Jeep / Childish Joke / Claim Jumper
Grand Cherokee - Grandmother's Ride Allows No Droop; Can't Hear Expensive Radio Over Knocking Engine and Exhaust
Liberty - Laughable Inferior Box Easily Rolls, Terrifying You
MJ - My Junk / Motor's Junk / Mom's Jeep / Moronic Jerk
Scrambler - Sad Crawl Ratio Always Makes Boring Life Excitingly Real
Renegade - Rolls Easily, Negating Emergency Gear And Destroying Everything
TJ - Tomorrow's Junk / Tow Job / Try Jacking / Transmission Jammed / Total Joke
Wagoneer - Willfully Atrocious Garbage; Obviously No Engineering Expertise Required
XJ - Xeno Junk
YJ - Yesterday's Junk / You Jerk / Yuppy's Jeep
ZJ - Zero Juice / Zoological Joke

Kia - Keep It Away / Killed in Action / Know It All (Ayeee!)
Sportage - Stupid Psychotic Owner Roasts Transmission And Gets Embarrassed

Lada - Lost And Dumfounded Again
Niva - No Inherent Value at All

Land Rover - Laughing At New Driver, Rolled On Very Easy Road
County - Crazily-Overpriced Unit Normally Taxi's Yokels
Defender - Driver Easily Forgets Everything; Normally Disabled on Every Rock
Discovery - Driver Ignorant; Saves Cash to Own a Very Expensive Ride for Yuppies
Range Rover - Replace All New Gears Eventually; Risk Of Violently Exploding Rear

Lincoln - Lousy Incompetant Numbskull Crashes; Obviously Legally Negligent
Navigator - Not A Very Interested Glance At This Overpriced Ride

Mazda - Mindless Automaton Zipping Dangerously Along
MPV - Mind Painfully Vacant
Navajo - Not A Vehicle A Judge Owns
Tribute - Terrifying Roll Into Bushes Ultimately Totalled Exterior

Mercedes - Many Easily Roll & Careen Effortlessly Down Endless Slopes
ML - More Lift / Money Lost / Moronic Loser
Unimog - Uncomfortable Noisy Imposing Monstrosity Often Grinds

Mercury - My Easily-Rolled Car Usually Requires Yanking
Mountaineer - Man Overjoyed Until New Transmission And Injectors Negate Electronics, Exploding Rapidly

Mitsubishi - Mournfully I've Tried Spending Unlimited Bucks; I Still Hate It
Montero - My Overrated New Truck Easily Rolls Over
Pajero - Poorly-Assembled Junk; Engine Replaced Often

Nissan - Now I'm Stuck, Send Another Nissan
Pathfinder - People Assume These High-Flying Idiots Normally Drive Easy Roads
Patrol - Phone A Taxi; Ripped Off Leafs
Hardbody - Happy And Retarded Driver Basically Only Delivers Yuppies
Frontier - Foolish Registered Owner Needs To Investigate Engine Replacement
Murano - Many Unnecessary Repairs Aggravate New Owners
Xterra - Xtreme Terrain Easily Rolls Risky Auto

Oldsmobile - Overpriced Leisurely-Driven Sport-ute, Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment / Oh Look Dear, Some Massive Oil-Burning Idiot's Leaking Everywhere
Bravada - Beats Riding A Very Ancient Dodge Aspen

Pontiac - Parting Out Now, Totalled It After Collision
Sunrunner - Some Unsuspecting Newbie Rolls Uncontrollably on Nice Normal Easy Roads

Saturn - Slow Americans Take Unmarked Roads Nowhere
Vue - Very Ugly Exterior / Very Useless Engine

Subaru - Something Usually Breaks And Renders it Useless
Brat - Beats Riding A Tricycle
Outback - Obviously Useless Transmission Breaks; Air Conditioning Kills

Suzuki - Slid Under Zooming Unimog; Killed Instantly
Grand Vitara - Grossly Restricted Articulation Normally Denotes Very Interesting Time At Rocky Areas
Samurai - Small Automobile Makes Urinals Really Appear Immense
Sidekick - Slow Ineffectual Deathtrap Endangers Kin In Collision Knockout

Tatra - Terrifyingly-Abominable Trash Receptable Approaches

Toyota - Tipped Over, Yanked Out To Asphalt
Highlander - Hopelessly Incompetent Grandpa Hates Lifts And Needs Daily Energy Ration
Land Cruiser - Lost And Needs Directions, Can't Return Until Idiot Searches Every Road
RAV4 - Really Awful Valueless 4wheeler
Tundra - Totally Uncoordinated New Driver Rolls Always

Volvo - Very Old Lady's Vehicle Only
Laplander - Last And Probably Lowest-Achieving National Defense Emergency Ride

Willys - We Invariably Like Long Yank Straps / What Incompetent Losers Like, Yes Siree

/==0=\
01-17-2004, 06:59 PM
you got too much time on your hands man :shrug

jackhart
01-20-2004, 09:02 AM
wtf is an "asuna"???

stangmata
01-20-2004, 09:12 AM
i think ASUNA is an aftermarket auto parts store....I may be wrong though.

EDIT: They made a car called the sunfire. You can see a picture of one here

http://www.cardomain.com/memberpage/357003

Who would have known?

origin
01-20-2004, 09:08 PM
Asuna is a Canadian Model, that GM put out to test the waters, like Geo, they put out the Sunrunner, Sunfire (aka Pontiac sunfire)

FordX4Redneck
01-25-2004, 11:38 AM
i got these two on my truck:

LIFE in ORDER of IMPORTANCE: SEX, COLD BEER, and a set of VERY LARGE TIRES

<CAUTION> DO NOT WASH...THIS VEHICLE UNDERGOING A SCIENTIFIC DIRT TEST

500channels
01-30-2004, 01:16 AM
Not the best, but I really, really hate Dodge's new ad campaign.

Yeah, it's got a Hemi- but who gives a shit?
or
Yeah, it's got a Hemi- but it still sucks.
or
Yeah, it's got a Hemi- but it's still a glorified minivan (Durango)

The last one doesn't exactly roll off the tongue, but it's pretty descripitive. Anyone else think the new Durango is shaped like their minivan, only with an ugly front grille and fenders?

danielbrown
01-30-2004, 04:42 PM
"Yeah, it's got a Hemi" more of those stickers are put on stuff that doesn't have a hemi than things that do. minivans, toilets, butts, and other objects. I'm gonna get one for my dad's Buick, and a few to put on the toilets at walmart.

BigNorm
02-03-2004, 07:22 PM
-You guys arguing like ya are is makin' me madder than a skinhead watchin' the Jeffersons!
-That was funnier than a hair lip orderin' biggie fries.
(Last two pirated from Larry the Cable Guy)
-This here motor is gonna run like a scalded cat.
-There's a substance I learned of during my stay down south in Louisiana. It's called Erl. It looks and works just like the oil. "Grab me anuder quart, yer low on erl"

Fun ones to play with your less than informed friends. "Hey, sounds like you need some muffler bearings." "Pick me up a case of oil and a dipstick return spring"

Have your kids test your new shocks buy jumping up and down in the bed of the truck. When they start to get tired tell them it still needs some more testing.

Damn. I'm all discomfobulated.

millpondmonster
02-03-2004, 07:25 PM
this one can be spotted on the back bumper of 2-1/2 ton bronco's Bronco ...." I don't give any $h!t, I don't take any $h!t, I'm not in the $h!t bussiness!" .... I thought it was pretty good.

BigNorm
02-03-2004, 10:37 PM
Favorite Bumper stickers=
- Save a Flag, Burn a Protestor
- Jesus Loves You, Everyone else thinks your an asshole
- Keep Nevada Green, Bring Money
- Welcome to Nevada, Spend your money and go home!
- I'm looking for the perfect woman, A nymphomaniac that owns a liquor store.
- Nevada, So many sheep, So little time
- Beer, Not just for breakfast anymore!
- I'm hung like Einstein, And Smart as a Horse!

MyFullSize
02-04-2004, 11:39 AM
- I'm hung like Einstein, And Smart as a Horse!

Har Har Har! Like that one best...

badblack88
02-08-2004, 05:15 AM
Cheap
Highly
Embarrassing
Vehicle
Runs
On
Luck
Every
Time

This is still my best one though.
http://www.superford.org/getfile.php?id=105895&toggle=fullsize&f=topless.jpg
I decided since it was my saying it needed to look more like my truck :thumbup
http://www.superford.org/getfile.php?id=105900&toggle=fullsize&f=topless5.jpg

That one was still my best one.... :rockon

Blown
02-10-2004, 03:23 AM
Here's some I stole from this site:

No hole's to deep, sloppy, or big for a Fullsize.

Once you go fullsize, you'll never go back.

Stolen from dblue: Hoofbeats are louder than heartbeats!

From Blaze bumper sticker: Your old lady says mine is bigger -Fullsizebronco.com

These were from Blaze and there was/is a site to get them:
http://www.superford.org/getfile.php?id=106345&toggle=fullsize&f=Vinyl_Designs.jpg

This is the link I had, not working tonight: http://fullsizebronco.decalkits.com/

millpondmonster
02-10-2004, 01:12 PM
Cheap
Highly
Embarrassing
Vehicle
Runs
On
Luck
Every
Time

This is still my best one though.
http://www.superford.org/getfile.php?id=105895&toggle=fullsize&f=topless.jpg
I decided since it was my saying it needed to look more like my truck :thumbup
http://www.superford.org/getfile.php?id=105900&toggle=fullsize&f=topless5.jpg

That one was still my best one.... :rockon


You know what they say.....I would rather be LUCKY than GOOD anytime... :histerica :beer :thumbup

Blown
02-11-2004, 05:57 AM
According to Blaze this link is dead. I here there is soemone who may take over the stuff. I worked in a sign shop for a while cutting vinyl. There are local shops all over where you can get custom stuff cut.

This is the link I had, not working tonight: http://fullsizebronco.decalkits.com/

big mike
02-13-2004, 10:03 PM
FORD...Fine Off Road Device

2fastnaz
02-17-2004, 05:04 PM
How about

"Injection is nice but I'd rather be Blown"

"Camero is an old Indian word for Fill this Fawker up again"

Burl Swift
02-18-2004, 02:56 PM
Here is the bumper sticker I was going to put on the Bronco, but I gave it to my buddy instead to put on his snow board:

"Smile lady...its the second best thing you can do with your lips."

Hope that doesn't offend any of our Bronco babes...

djmunster0@aol.com
02-21-2004, 01:50 PM
my truck will eat your suv

Blown
02-21-2004, 04:05 PM
Size does count!

Ladies like my Fullsize!

Don't need no stinking magic, it's Fullsize!

rmyers2051
02-22-2004, 10:50 PM
"Don't follow me, you can't make it"

rocko350
02-27-2005, 12:28 AM
do not wash vehicle undergoing scientific dirt test
those with the most lug nuts at a 4 way stop has the right of way
stop tailgaiting or ill flip a booger on your windshield

rocko350
02-27-2005, 12:29 AM
fsb offroading... the deeper you go the wilder it gets

darb
02-27-2005, 12:51 AM
Favorite Bumper stickers=
- I'm hung like Einstein, And Smart as a Horse!

I'm gonna get my ass kicked for this.

What's the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth?














Einstein's penis


brad

Blown
02-27-2005, 07:59 AM
The muffler bearings need replacing.

Blinker fluid? :thumbup

F'king Off Road Daily! :rockon

Any good ones for B-R-O-N-C-O? :shrug

Hopper
02-27-2005, 03:21 PM
"Runs like a striped assed ape!" Er, forgive if someones allready pointed this out (didn't read pages 2,3,&4), but that is an old racial remark. Lotsa guys said back in the day that black people look like apes (wide nostrials ect.) And a slave that acted up would get whipped, leaving stripes. Then the slave would quickly get to work, hence "running like a striped assed ape" could be construed to mean an engine or truck is working well, or is moving fast. One more thing, I am not racist, so don't take this that way.

BigNorm
02-27-2005, 03:31 PM
Madder than a skinhead watching the Jeffersons.

Big Mike C.
02-27-2005, 07:27 PM
slicker than greased owl shit...
quicker than a sumbitch...
faster than all hell...
the deeper you go, the sloppier it gets...


http://www.supermotors.org/getfile/106905/fullsize/IMG_0009.jpg

texastrucker
02-27-2005, 09:20 PM
Ford- F***ing Old Rusted Dump
GMC- Gay Mans Chevy
GMC Yukon- YU-got-KONed on your Gay Mans Chevy (friend made this one up, thought it was funny, or maybe you just had to be there? :shrug )

:thumbup

ssgtdirt
03-05-2005, 08:14 PM
on the rear window of my bronco.........

little boys wear bowties
big boys drive
FORD (actually the blue logo)

i can try posting pics in a few days

MyFullSize
03-06-2005, 08:21 AM
I like Jeeps, Mmmmm taste like chicken! :thumbup

Cats do too! Meooow!

Blown
03-28-2005, 04:04 PM
Fullsize Offroad Racing Device

AndyBronco
03-28-2005, 08:24 PM
For Off Road Driving.

Dawg Bones
03-30-2005, 11:57 PM
Lift it....fat chicks can't jump!

Dawg Bones
03-30-2005, 11:58 PM
life's short..drive your bronco naked

Dawg Bones
03-31-2005, 12:04 AM
Been talking to my dad up in NC, He saw this one out on Tellico on a POS Scout gettin r dun
"don't laugh, your daughter might be in here"

Blown
03-31-2005, 12:17 PM
Size matters - Play dirty with a fullsize

Size matters - Play with an FSB

Wanna' play with my fullsize?

broncolade
04-01-2005, 11:29 PM
Chevy Thunder is just rod knock

I like my women like I like my Bronco Topless

If it has tits or tires your gonna have trouble

Code Blue Ford just stopped the heartbeat

Not a auto thing but its funny, Do you know the difference between a harley and a shop vaccum. The position of the dirtbag.

Dawg Bones
04-03-2005, 12:22 AM
"Dude im probably better off then you'll ever be in your entire life. So get off your high horse and take a dam joke, lol. You think i went low by doing a momma joke, well same with you with the redneck joke. Its old stuff man get over it. I tell ya what, if u wanna fight ....... shove your head up my arse and fight for air"
From chat between Chicago and Arkansas

If both of you belong to your local chapter, lets start a tourney of elimination to see whos' got braggin rights! Win your chapter then go head to head with other regions for the "BAFS"..... Baddest Ass Full Size!!! (Or pull out your peckers, measure and kiss and make up) Anybody else think that would be awesome? Kinda of a "tuff Bronco" challenge? I know one thing, I personally wouldn't win or even enter to save face, but I'd pay money to watch....

In the Immortal words of Mills Lane "let's get it on!"
:boxing

reptillikus
04-03-2005, 09:38 PM
Lift it....fat chicks can't jump!
my bro has that on his truck :toothless

tmwalmart
04-06-2005, 01:40 AM
lol I got my bro one like that for his Frontier 'cept it says 'No Fat Chicks, Truck Will Scrape.' :histerica

78Bronco4x4
04-10-2005, 10:13 AM
I like this one from the first page.

"You can either get a small size and swap in full size running gear or get a fullsize and beat it down to a small size on the trails."

96broncoman
05-17-2005, 10:03 AM
heres one yall aint said yet, TOYOTA-> Take Off Your Oversized Tires, Asshole
lol, i love that one. gmc could also be gay mans CHARIOT, but chevorlet works too.

kwboom
06-17-2005, 08:42 PM
I read this somewhere........

My lugnuts need more torque than your Honda makes........ :rockon :histerica

83bronco5.0
07-05-2005, 01:23 PM
.

NineT3
07-22-2005, 01:09 PM
how about infamous acronyms?

Pontiac - Poor Old ****** Thinks Its A Cadillac
KIA - Killed In Action (Actually Military)
Ford - Found On The Road Dead/Fix Or Repair Daily/****ed Over Rebuilt Dodge
Chevy - Cheapest Heap Ever enVisioned Yet
Buick - Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
Saab - Something An Asshole Bought
Dodge - Dear Old Dad's Garage Experiment
Jeep - Just Empty Every Pocket
Honda - Had One, Never Drove Again
Hyundai - Hope You Understand Nothing is Driveable AND Inexpensive
Mopar - Mostly Old Parts And Rust
GM - Girly Man

Added:

Chevy: Cheapest Heap Ever Vandalized Yearly :chili:

ole haus
07-22-2005, 01:58 PM
The truth about wheelin comin in on vacation leavin on probation

Dawg Bones
08-22-2005, 09:57 AM
if you can read....then you don't drive a Chevy.

Mittsusushi

VW- boltsbangin

inAcurate

Volvula.....Volblow

"You Audi buy somethin else"

Gettin lots of ******y in my Fur-are-i

laborghonna cost too much!

j w griffith
08-22-2005, 10:38 AM
i saw a bumper sticker that says "bend over i'll drive" and a fake parking ticket that says "if you f*** like you park, you'll never get it in".

cowboy_tech
08-28-2005, 12:44 AM
"Driver carries no cash, he's married"

Hyenuf
08-28-2005, 06:35 PM
If it ain't broke don't fix it

If it's TTB trust me..... It's Broke!!

rmyers2051
08-28-2005, 10:11 PM
It's a Rock;Get Over It!

Ptack1
09-03-2005, 05:35 PM
"dont laugh its paid for"

Saw this on a POS honda, but thought it was flippin hilarious.

blackbroncoxlt65
09-03-2005, 08:42 PM
my other ride is your girlfriend

blackbroncoxlt65
09-03-2005, 08:43 PM
:twotu:

my other ride is your girlfriend :twotu:

DUNK
09-03-2005, 09:08 PM
It's FORD country on a quiet night, If you listen close enough you can hear a CHEVY rust!!! :goodfinge

Bighibbi
10-21-2005, 05:19 PM
Chevy: Like a Rock, It always breaks down!

waltman
10-21-2005, 06:42 PM
Here's a few bumper stickers I've come across.
YOUR MOM SHOULD HAVE SWALLOWED YOU
there'ld be one less idiot in the world

Daddy's little princess is my little whore

Why do they call it an ASSUNA?
because when you first buy it you assuna it's a good buy

jlayne
10-25-2005, 10:36 AM
mopar

moments of power are rare

FordTruckMan89
10-25-2005, 03:44 PM
"Little boys wear boyties"
"my lugnuts take more torque than your import makes!"
"im not tailgating, im drafting"

and this one i saw on a honda in the mcdonalds parkin lot
"if your gonna ride my a** at least pull my hair" hahahaah i hope it was a girl

96broncoman
10-26-2005, 12:00 PM
mopar

moments of power are rare
haha, that one great.

lessmiles
10-27-2005, 12:49 AM
CHEVROLET: It shivers on the road & lays in the garage.
I could have that backwards.

96broncoman
10-27-2005, 01:12 AM
CHEVROLET: It shivers on the road & lays in the garage.
I could have that backwards.
i dont get it, either way....please explain.

lessmiles
10-27-2005, 02:57 AM
its no fun if you gotta explain it. i heard it about 15 years ago from an old man at work. it could be 50 years old. i don't know.

shiver-lay
???

96broncoman
10-27-2005, 11:18 AM
oh, i get it now, haha, yeah, may be fiddy years old....

Blown
11-29-2005, 05:40 PM
Why settle for a Hummer when you can get one that will go all the way?

or

I had a Hummer once, but prefered the one that went all the way!

Chevy_Stomper
11-29-2005, 06:17 PM
http://img207.imageshack.us/img207/6288/4172111fh.gif

"It's All fun And Games Until You Get Beat By A Girl"

"Lowriders Are For Little Boys Who Can't Get It Up"

"Life's Short Go 4 Wheelin' Naked"

GSBroncometal
12-02-2005, 10:12 PM
my broncos lugnuts use more torque than your honda puts out

pissrpr
12-03-2005, 10:01 AM
I guess I will share abit of wisdom my pops passed down to me while lapping valves on an old lawn mower engine when I was about 10:

"Son, women are like small engines - The intake and exhaust are real close together"

ap4destruction
12-09-2005, 08:15 PM
this is one of those little acrostic type poem things CHEVEROLET Can Hear Every Valve Rap Over Long Extended Trip or Can Hear Ever Valve Rap Over Lousy Enging Timing... Just take the first letter from cheverolet to make the poem as you can see..

pissrpr
12-13-2005, 11:11 AM
Is this why so many guys like dodge?

http://www.supermotors.org/getfile/272935/fullsize/dodge.jpg

New slogan: Grab life by the ovaries!

If it's a repost then :goodfinge :goodfinge :goodfinge

46079bronco
12-14-2005, 05:38 PM
WOW...thats great!!!!





have you driven OVER a chevy latly

TheUnforgiven
12-14-2005, 05:56 PM
Is this why so many guys like dodge?

http://www.supermotors.org/getfile/272935/fullsize/dodge.jpg

New slogan: Grab life by the ovaries!

If it's a repost then :goodfinge :goodfinge :goodfinge


oh my god that's awesome!!! :histerica :histerica :rofl: :rofl:

TheUnforgiven
12-14-2005, 05:58 PM
It's nitrous, not NOS, if you can't say it, don't spray it.

So, my 2 liter of Mt. Dew here has more displacement than your Honda?

Dodge
Drips Oil Drops Gears Everywhere

Dodge
Dumb Old Damned German Engineers

cr69ml
12-14-2005, 05:59 PM
Take Off Your Oversized Tires Asshole :histerica

TheUnforgiven
12-14-2005, 06:39 PM
:lolup

badpony93
12-14-2005, 08:43 PM
saw this one on a dodge the other day
"ford ha, you may be strokin but ima cummin."
thought that was great.

"i understand the jeep thing, that's why i drive a bronco"

"this truck runs on gas, not friendship, pay up or get the hell out"

"ass grass or cash no one rides for free."

351M
12-15-2005, 01:08 AM
Dude, I'm probably better off than you'll ever be in your entire life.

How's that? At 25, I own a 3 story home on the far northwest side of Chicago. (Check the prices around here, there isn't a home under 270,000).

I drive my 94 Bronco,2001 Eldo STS,69 Goat,and my 85 Trans Am, AND have the garage space to put them in (minus the Bronco).

I work for Cook Cty. State Attorney's Office and am working towards a Masters in poli-sci. My "high horse" is comfortable...I think I'll stay here awhile ;-) Now, maybe you "Arkansas'rs" like having heads stuck up their rears...but here in Chicago, we usually just kick the hell out of you.

you live in your i mean your moms bronco and that 3 bay garage you talk about is chicago impound yard:beer

Pantsman
03-29-2006, 05:25 PM
Wow I'm coming in really late but my favorite bumper sticker I've ever seen was...

"If god didn't want us to eat animals then he wouldn't have made them out of food."

Dusty
03-29-2006, 10:51 PM
PETA- Peple Eating Tasty Anamils
FORD- Eatin Chevy's Shittin Dodges!
honda's like a fat girl, Had One Never Did IT Again!

quicksilver3602003
03-30-2006, 05:16 PM
My friend has a shirt that has H2 recovery team with a bronco pulling about an H2... its funny

boggking
04-08-2006, 06:44 PM
Junk
Each&
Every
Part


Flipped
Over
Reservation
Decoration

Fanatic
Off
Road
Diehards

FordbyFord
04-09-2006, 10:31 PM
Ford- For Our Real Drivers
Dodge Dirps Oil Drops Gears Everywhere


Thats all I can think of...

Nemesis
04-10-2006, 10:11 PM
The Bumper sticker I want says. If you can't stop in time Honk as you slide under.:twak

Nemesis

quiefinator
04-11-2006, 12:53 PM
mud pits are like a hot chick w/ std's,you wanna hit it, but your scared of the consequences

roach57
04-12-2006, 04:05 AM
a couple i saw where,

"Don't laugh your daughter might be in here"

"Lift it, fat chicks can't jump"

BroncoMatt
04-18-2006, 04:09 AM
Jeep - A nice light snack
Nice Jeep, Barbie's got one just like it
Jeeps are like tampons, every p***y needs one

and one I saw on a cute lil bronco 2
"never drive faster than your angels can fly"
I know it's pansy but cute

1ole4d
04-24-2006, 12:30 PM
How about this...picture a baby sucking on a nitrous bottle and reading..."Babies suck on bottles...real men get BLOWN!"

No4Low
04-24-2006, 12:52 PM
How about this...picture a baby sucking on a nitrous bottle and reading..."Babies suck on bottles...real men get BLOWN!"

I like that one! I have a friend with a camero ss and he wants to put it on juice, I always tell him bottles are for babies!