....I am the way I am.

I had thought it in the back of my head, and part of me thought maybe I really am just an anti-social hermit...but its been confirmed by doctors. I had a neuro-psych eval, a day long of cognitive testing.

The age at which I got sick - I was 16, a junior in high school - is the crucial age when you start to develope your personality and social skills. Because I was overwhelmed with kidney failure and dialysis, my social life took a back seat. I never did the things normal kids do, and the only people I EVER interracted with in a social setting was my immediate family.

Until VERY recently, like within the last year and a half, I've just started meeting new friends (like ya'll) and some friends from another local website. My girl Tammy (not DixieDoll) she remembers a time when I showed up and I literally didn't say ONE word. She's seen the progress and tells me how much better I've become about talking.

Its just SO hard for me to find things to talk about. I don't have memories or experiences. I've spent the last 8 or so years either at home, running small errands, or at dialysis.


Anyhow, I see myself spending more time, either talking trucks or wheeling with ya'll and I think its important that ya'll as a group know where I'm coming from so I don't come off as some cold hearted bitch. I really AM trying. I don't like being shy and quiet and I WISH like hell I could bring the Trouble Maker out in person. But I'm working on it. Its gonna take time and effort on my part, but its part of my progress...right there with getting me physically healthy.


:)

Now I told you we would crack that shell. It's no big deal nobody thought any thing bad Mel. We just got to get your mouth to work as good as your typing fingers. Alright guys get your mind outa the gutter I did not mean it like that. Anyways you will get better it takes more practice. That just means the group needs more meet and greets.:thumbup

Thank you for sharing, Mel! It's totally understandable to have such a reaction to what you've been through. I've not known you that long, but I think you're doing great! I know some here give you hell about your quieter IRL persona vs your online one, (coughSmoothcough) but you're the one who has to decide what you're comfortable with.

And I enjoy hanging out with you, regardless! :thumbup

Mel,

I understand what your going through. I've pretty much my whole life been the quiet guy, and not very social, except for just a few of my closest friends. Throughout school, I was sick a lot also, and sometimes just "sick", so I really missed out on a lot of the normal socializing activities. The past couple years I have gotten much better, and gotten over my shyness somewhat. I think the biggest thing that helped me get over my problem was my job. I've been in sales for almost 5 years, and that pretty much forced me to talk and interact with people. But some people are just intraverts (so online speaking is perfect) while others are extraverts, and enjoy speaking out loud and in person. As you guys noticed at the meeting, I'm not very talkative either. So I pretty much know where your coming from, and understand completely. Don't worry, it'll get easier:D

--Jeff

Were here for ya BB...you just do what feels right darlin'..we love ya either way!:thumbup

Originally posted by 79F150
That just means the group needs more meet and greets.


Zackly! :thumbup


That's how its been with Tammy, the more and more I hang out with them, the more comfortable I get, but then I go 2-3 months without seeing anybody and its like I start all over. :(

Ya'll are great, thanks for listening and understanding. :thumbup

Now we need a wheeling trip In Ga for everyone and a strong young stud for Mel to co-piolet at the next meet and greet.:thumbup

You take all the time you need, and let us know if there is anything we can do to help. I always joke w/you mels, but you also know how interested and concerned I am for your well being. So you just set your own pace and know we are here for you.

I agree w/ Jeff. I was always a wall flower (I know--hard to believe) until I got into a sales job and it really helped me learn how to communicate with the public and how to deal with people...

Originally posted by SMOOTH
...you just set your own pace and know we are here for you.

I couldn't have said it better myself... If you ever need us to help with anything or if there's something we can do for you, just shoot us an email (but a phone call would be better):thumbup

Hey girl what matters is how you feel about yourself. Keep up the good work. You will come out of that shell when you are damn good and ready and we want to be there.

Hey Mels I am right there with ya also. Growing up my family didn't have to $$ or transportation to take me places so I could enteract with my peers and we didn't live around alot of neighbors. So it was pretty much me and my brothers. We have talked about the way we are too. I've had people say that when they first met me they thought I was a snob. But that just wasn't the case. I have friends that can just walk up to anyone and start a conversation and also know tons of people. Makes me kind of mad. So when I am around people I don't know I try to strike up some kind of converstation. I to am getting better at conversing with people. So if I am at the next M & G then you and I can sit in the corner and watch everyone...:toothless :toothless Nah really like I said I know what you are saying and like everyone else said take your time and we is all like family here.

Originally posted by BlkBronco
I understand what your going through.

Originally posted by Ogeechee 4x4
I was always a wall flower

Originally posted by Miketnf150
Hey Mels I am right there with ya also.

Wow! That's cool so many of you are so open about this.

:shrug I never have had a problem talking to people. Maybe the people I am talking to have a problem with it, but I sure don't. :thumbup

Mels, we all have to realize that it takes all kinds of people to make this sorry world worth living in. If we were all alike, think how boring that would be. How would we choose to be; intravert, extravert or somewhere in between. At some point the human race would cease to exist due to self inflicted boredom. Then whats the point? God made us all different, with strengths and weaknesses. Our job is to encourage each other to get up in the morning and do it all over again. The day we are made perfect in Him is the day to strive for. That's the reason to go on living, whatever way we are able. Know this, based on the responses to your post; you ARE truly loved. God bless you and you keep on keeping on girl.

Originally posted by Jims88Bronco
Mels, we all have to realize that it takes all kinds of people to make this sorry world worth living in. If we were all alike, think how boring that would be. How would we choose to be; intravert, extravert or somewhere in between. At some point the human race would cease to exist due to self inflicted boredom. Then whats the point? God made us all different, with strengths and weaknesses. Our job is to encourage each other to get up in the morning and do it all over again. The day we are made perfect in Him is the day to strive for. That's the reason to go on living, whatever way we are able. Know this, based on the responses to your post; you ARE truly loved. God bless you and you keep on keeping on girl.

I think that is the most intelligent thing I have every heard. For such a guy that loves to joke you do have a very serious side.

Originally posted by Jims88Bronco
Mels, we all have to realize that it takes all kinds of people to make this sorry world worth living in. If we were all alike, think how boring that would be. How would we choose to be; intravert, extravert or somewhere in between. At some point the human race would cease to exist due to self inflicted boredom. Then whats the point? God made us all different, with strengths and weaknesses. Our job is to encourage each other to get up in the morning and do it all over again. The day we are made perfect in Him is the day to strive for. That's the reason to go on living, whatever way we are able. Know this, based on the responses to your post; you ARE truly loved. God bless you and you keep on keeping on girl.


Aww, thanks Jim. That's an awesome thing to say and it means alot to me. :)

Dude all that from someone in Alabama. What is this world comming to.:cry

Originally posted by Jims88Bronco
Mels, we all have to realize that it takes all kinds of people to make this sorry world worth living in. If we were all alike, think how boring that would be. How would we choose to be; intravert, extravert or somewhere in between. At some point the human race would cease to exist due to self inflicted boredom. Then whats the point? God made us all different, with strengths and weaknesses. Our job is to encourage each other to get up in the morning and do it all over again. The day we are made perfect in Him is the day to strive for. That's the reason to go on living, whatever way we are able. Know this, based on the responses to your post; you ARE truly loved. God bless you and you keep on keeping on girl.

Dude hit the nail right on the head brah!:thumbup :thumbup

Just think if all automobiles were Broncos and everyone loved offroading:thumbup :thumbup What a world it would be then...:D :D :D

Originally posted by 79F150
Now we need a strong young stud for Mel to co-piolet at the next meet and greet.:thumbup



Someone mention my name??? :D ;)

Originally posted by Dixie Pirate
Someone mention my name???


http://bellsouthpwp.net/m/e/mel383/smilies/yup.gif

:lolup :lolup Could be some HOTLUVN in HOTLANTA tonight!!!:D :D

I know what that's like. I've been diagnosed with a mild case of autism. It really sucks because it's hard to get to know people. I want to talk to people, but I just don't know what to say.

That is no reason to be shy hell half the time I can't get out what I am trying to say and the other times it comes out like I got tarrets syndrome (sp). Anyways don't be shy we accept everyone for who they are.:thumbup