zippo
06-02-2007, 12:08 AM
Posers be warned! -----------
New club policy:
Posers shall not themselves call 'Poser!" on other fellow posers.
Off Roading Poser defined: Any person who drives a 4x4 truck without the need, intent, or desire to actually use the 4 wheel drive components and is objectionable or unfamiliar with off-pavement travel.
A 'Poser' may include but is not limited to the following conditions:
Some 'posers' get their jollies by mere association with drivers who actually do use their 4x4 equipped trucks. Getting rugged vicariously through other drivers but not necessarily with them is grounds for labeling as a 'poser' assuming they aren't expressly a passenger in this thing we call life. 'Poser' can refer to truck or driver but is usually meant as a hybrid cross labeling of both simultaneously.
You may be a poser if your truck has larger-than-stock tires that have a hint or more of Armor All on the sidewalls (not valid for April Fools Day incase an Armor All bandit goes on a rampage during the night). Since show trucks are rarely ever on the trail, this encompases 99% of show trucks. Have you ever seen Armor All help your traction? No, I didn't think so.
You may be a poser if your truck with the above mentioned larger tires has no cuts in the tread (may exclude baja trucks, which shall be required to prove themselves with massive big-air jumps). We judge trucks that have larger-than-stock tires because it implies the owner/driver had some say in making that choice which further implies there was the thought process of "Hey, I could get these bigger tires and (either) look cool and (or) go more places than I could before (like the farther-out parking lot at the mall or the grass over-flow parking area at the fair grounds)."
You may be a poser if you drive a full-size crew cab long bed truck that is lifted and shod with big meats (which have probably seen Armor All from time to time). Redemption may be had by merciless floggings through the dunes or mud bogs but you still may have to be on your toes when around skeptical seasoned wheelers.
You may be a poser if your truck has a more elaborate paint job than factory that affects the driver's judgement and willingness to go off-road (i.e. "I don't want to scratch my paint-itis").
You may be a poser if your truck is so heavily equipped with after-market accessories (like a 'performance oriented' fiberglass cowl induction hood, mud flaps on a Wrangler, or huge chrome nerf bars) that affects the driver's judgement and willingness to go off-road.
You may be a poser if your truck's snorkel faces rearward. (Hahaha Just kidding Wes!)
You may be a poser if your truck could be mistaken for an advertisement for a chrome bolt-on accessories catalog, a Lund Accessories visor/flares/bug shield catalog, or the JC Whitney catalog....unless it's really ghetto-fab white-trash-tacular, then we'll accept it with open arms.
You may be a poser if your tow-rig category type truck has a huge lift and a drop trailer hitch of greater than 18" or your tow vehicle category type truck (i.e. HD 3/4 T and 1T trucks and diesels) was purchased without a pre-existing need (or forseeable intent) to haul or tow some load that justifies the "need" for the truck where the actual "load" could have fit in a Honda hatchback. Dually trucks used solely for bumper pull trailers (i.e. non-gooseneck/5th wheel type trailers and slide-in bed campers) also come up as partial wasted trucks as that is the primary benefit of having the dual tires. Highly lifted stock dually trucks usually fall into the show truck theme and serve no real world purpose as they're too un-manueverable to off-road and their too tall to load up with crap and too tall to let a gooseneck trailer hook up to. So you guessd it! yup. Poser.
You may be a poser if your truck has been modified with more than two shocks per front corner and one shock per rear corner (except those who can prove that the extra shocks are there to dampen something....like the landings from big-air jumps....like performed with black S-10 pickups at Glamis WooHoo Arty!). We need to state here that shock absorbers' purpose in life are to limit suspension cylce oscillation, NOT prevent movement all-together.
You may be a poser if your truck sports more body lift than suspension lift or sports body lift as the only form of lift. Double stacking two like frames to gain body lift is just plain Red Neck Booty Fab Ghetto-Tacular and is not considered poser-ish.
You may be a poser if you've debated longer than 30 seconds whether to get the 3.5" lift or the 4" lift for your truck. The poser quote heard here is: "I'm not sure if I'm ready for a full 4 inches yet".
You may be a poser if your huge 4x4 truck has no front driveshaft and because of zero degree pinion angle, couldn't have one even if you were wanted to use 4WD. Just as bad is if your ride is a HUGE 2WD truck with no front drive axle. These nearly unforgivable sins may be justified with resonable effort to show intent to equip with afforementioned driveshaft and/or ability to crush cars in only 2WD.
You may be a poser if you're so unfamiliar with using your truck's 4 wheel drive lever that you can't shift blindly between every available option in their t-case and know without trial and error what action (with regard to the transmission shift lever) is required to shift the transfercase. Furthermore, just by feeling the shift knob, you can't tell which position (2H, 4H,N, or 4L) your t-case is in without looking. This all equates to how often the truck's 4WD system has been used which is a direct correlation to whether someone really needs 4WD which is a primary factor in 'Posing'. Some drivers simply forget to shift to 4WD (haha Tree Smacker Cayton!). This is merely a situation of learning curve retardation and is best remedied by frequent public ridicule.
:toothless
New club policy:
Posers shall not themselves call 'Poser!" on other fellow posers.
Off Roading Poser defined: Any person who drives a 4x4 truck without the need, intent, or desire to actually use the 4 wheel drive components and is objectionable or unfamiliar with off-pavement travel.
A 'Poser' may include but is not limited to the following conditions:
Some 'posers' get their jollies by mere association with drivers who actually do use their 4x4 equipped trucks. Getting rugged vicariously through other drivers but not necessarily with them is grounds for labeling as a 'poser' assuming they aren't expressly a passenger in this thing we call life. 'Poser' can refer to truck or driver but is usually meant as a hybrid cross labeling of both simultaneously.
You may be a poser if your truck has larger-than-stock tires that have a hint or more of Armor All on the sidewalls (not valid for April Fools Day incase an Armor All bandit goes on a rampage during the night). Since show trucks are rarely ever on the trail, this encompases 99% of show trucks. Have you ever seen Armor All help your traction? No, I didn't think so.
You may be a poser if your truck with the above mentioned larger tires has no cuts in the tread (may exclude baja trucks, which shall be required to prove themselves with massive big-air jumps). We judge trucks that have larger-than-stock tires because it implies the owner/driver had some say in making that choice which further implies there was the thought process of "Hey, I could get these bigger tires and (either) look cool and (or) go more places than I could before (like the farther-out parking lot at the mall or the grass over-flow parking area at the fair grounds)."
You may be a poser if you drive a full-size crew cab long bed truck that is lifted and shod with big meats (which have probably seen Armor All from time to time). Redemption may be had by merciless floggings through the dunes or mud bogs but you still may have to be on your toes when around skeptical seasoned wheelers.
You may be a poser if your truck has a more elaborate paint job than factory that affects the driver's judgement and willingness to go off-road (i.e. "I don't want to scratch my paint-itis").
You may be a poser if your truck is so heavily equipped with after-market accessories (like a 'performance oriented' fiberglass cowl induction hood, mud flaps on a Wrangler, or huge chrome nerf bars) that affects the driver's judgement and willingness to go off-road.
You may be a poser if your truck's snorkel faces rearward. (Hahaha Just kidding Wes!)
You may be a poser if your truck could be mistaken for an advertisement for a chrome bolt-on accessories catalog, a Lund Accessories visor/flares/bug shield catalog, or the JC Whitney catalog....unless it's really ghetto-fab white-trash-tacular, then we'll accept it with open arms.
You may be a poser if your tow-rig category type truck has a huge lift and a drop trailer hitch of greater than 18" or your tow vehicle category type truck (i.e. HD 3/4 T and 1T trucks and diesels) was purchased without a pre-existing need (or forseeable intent) to haul or tow some load that justifies the "need" for the truck where the actual "load" could have fit in a Honda hatchback. Dually trucks used solely for bumper pull trailers (i.e. non-gooseneck/5th wheel type trailers and slide-in bed campers) also come up as partial wasted trucks as that is the primary benefit of having the dual tires. Highly lifted stock dually trucks usually fall into the show truck theme and serve no real world purpose as they're too un-manueverable to off-road and their too tall to load up with crap and too tall to let a gooseneck trailer hook up to. So you guessd it! yup. Poser.
You may be a poser if your truck has been modified with more than two shocks per front corner and one shock per rear corner (except those who can prove that the extra shocks are there to dampen something....like the landings from big-air jumps....like performed with black S-10 pickups at Glamis WooHoo Arty!). We need to state here that shock absorbers' purpose in life are to limit suspension cylce oscillation, NOT prevent movement all-together.
You may be a poser if your truck sports more body lift than suspension lift or sports body lift as the only form of lift. Double stacking two like frames to gain body lift is just plain Red Neck Booty Fab Ghetto-Tacular and is not considered poser-ish.
You may be a poser if you've debated longer than 30 seconds whether to get the 3.5" lift or the 4" lift for your truck. The poser quote heard here is: "I'm not sure if I'm ready for a full 4 inches yet".
You may be a poser if your huge 4x4 truck has no front driveshaft and because of zero degree pinion angle, couldn't have one even if you were wanted to use 4WD. Just as bad is if your ride is a HUGE 2WD truck with no front drive axle. These nearly unforgivable sins may be justified with resonable effort to show intent to equip with afforementioned driveshaft and/or ability to crush cars in only 2WD.
You may be a poser if you're so unfamiliar with using your truck's 4 wheel drive lever that you can't shift blindly between every available option in their t-case and know without trial and error what action (with regard to the transmission shift lever) is required to shift the transfercase. Furthermore, just by feeling the shift knob, you can't tell which position (2H, 4H,N, or 4L) your t-case is in without looking. This all equates to how often the truck's 4WD system has been used which is a direct correlation to whether someone really needs 4WD which is a primary factor in 'Posing'. Some drivers simply forget to shift to 4WD (haha Tree Smacker Cayton!). This is merely a situation of learning curve retardation and is best remedied by frequent public ridicule.
:toothless