how in the hell can you leave food in the fridge for a year and a half?
Oh that's easy....
1-I live alone
2-I can't cook for shit
3-I work 2 jobs so I'm hardly ever home, and almost always eat out
4-I'm a slob :toothless
5-I don't really care what else is in my fridge just as long as the beer is cold
6-I have to take my trash to the dump, and I hate putting smelly trash bags in the back of my Bronco
7-I'm lazy
8-I have better things to do than worry about what's still in my fridge
9-I never leave anything in my fridge that will smell bad after a couple of days
(well.. there was this one time .... more on that below.... it's a funny story)
10-I might inadvertantly discover the cure for cancer in my fridge!
A few years ago when I still lived in NY my mom made me take home some leftover easter ham. She gave it to me in a corningware pot. I ate some of it, but after a few days I felt it wasn't safe to finish it off... so I left it.
Well X-mas came around, and my mom asked me to bring back her corningware because she needed it to cook X-mas dinner. I forgot that I still even had it. I found it in my fridge......with something that used to be ham, but sure didn't look like ham anymore!
X-mas day I wrapped the whole pot in saran wrap so it would be safe to transport to my mom's house without killing one from the deadly gas that would be emitted out if the top fell off durring the drive. I then snuck into my mom's kitchen, unwrapped it, and left it right on the counter. (she was upstairs getting dressed or something). I then resorted to the living room to play with my nephews.
My mom heard me come in (but was oblivious to my quick, ninja-like sprint to the kitchen) and rushed down to greet me. There was much merryment.
Here's a transcript to the event that unfolded just minutes later:
MOM: It's so good to see you!
Me: Yeah, and I even remembered to bring back your pot! (acting all proud)
MOM: Oh great! I need it for the stuffing, and I broke my other one I usually use.
ME: Well it's right on the counter! (hehehe)
***Mom walks into the kitchen***
MOM: (shreiking) "GODDAMNIT PAUL!!!" :shocked
Me: (grins and winks knowingly to my brothers :hump )
***Mom is then seen bolting out of the kitchen with the pot held out in front of her as far away from her face as humany possible, he head turned to one side, dry heaving, with a look of complete horror, and disgust I've never seen before right out the front door of her condo nearly tearing the storm door from it's hinges.****
Me: :rockon :rockon :rockon :rockon :rockon
My brother: :histerica :histerica :histerica :histerica :histerica
My other brother: :histerica :histerica :histerica :histerica :histerica
My clueless little sister: :uhoh3 What happened?
My 7year old nephew: :wacko grandma's weird :wacko
My 3 year old nephew: (just continues playing :smash )
For the rest of the day my mom did this to me :slap
Ahhhh.... it was a x-mas to remember! :santa
:rockon
