[Handy_andy_cv64]

dumb question......but......are you putting the filter on with the gasket bone dry?

There's never any such thing as a 'dumb' question. You brought up a valid point. Always coat the gasket with a thin film of fresh oil, then when the gasket contacts the mounting surface, 1/2 to 3/4 of a turn more to properly tighten. The oil not only lubes the gasket to prevent damage on install, but allows the proper amount of torque to seal.