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11,918 Posts
....I am the way I am.
I had thought it in the back of my head, and part of me thought maybe I really am just an anti-social hermit...but its been confirmed by doctors. I had a neuro-psych eval, a day long of cognitive testing.
The age at which I got sick - I was 16, a junior in high school - is the crucial age when you start to develope your personality and social skills. Because I was overwhelmed with kidney failure and dialysis, my social life took a back seat. I never did the things normal kids do, and the only people I EVER interracted with in a social setting was my immediate family.
Until VERY recently, like within the last year and a half, I've just started meeting new friends (like ya'll) and some friends from another local website. My girl Tammy (not DixieDoll) she remembers a time when I showed up and I literally didn't say ONE word. She's seen the progress and tells me how much better I've become about talking.
Its just SO hard for me to find things to talk about. I don't have memories or experiences. I've spent the last 8 or so years either at home, running small errands, or at dialysis.
Anyhow, I see myself spending more time, either talking trucks or wheeling with ya'll and I think its important that ya'll as a group know where I'm coming from so I don't come off as some cold hearted bitch. I really AM trying. I don't like being shy and quiet and I WISH like hell I could bring the Trouble Maker out in person. But I'm working on it. Its gonna take time and effort on my part, but its part of my progress...right there with getting me physically healthy.

I had thought it in the back of my head, and part of me thought maybe I really am just an anti-social hermit...but its been confirmed by doctors. I had a neuro-psych eval, a day long of cognitive testing.
The age at which I got sick - I was 16, a junior in high school - is the crucial age when you start to develope your personality and social skills. Because I was overwhelmed with kidney failure and dialysis, my social life took a back seat. I never did the things normal kids do, and the only people I EVER interracted with in a social setting was my immediate family.
Until VERY recently, like within the last year and a half, I've just started meeting new friends (like ya'll) and some friends from another local website. My girl Tammy (not DixieDoll) she remembers a time when I showed up and I literally didn't say ONE word. She's seen the progress and tells me how much better I've become about talking.
Its just SO hard for me to find things to talk about. I don't have memories or experiences. I've spent the last 8 or so years either at home, running small errands, or at dialysis.
Anyhow, I see myself spending more time, either talking trucks or wheeling with ya'll and I think its important that ya'll as a group know where I'm coming from so I don't come off as some cold hearted bitch. I really AM trying. I don't like being shy and quiet and I WISH like hell I could bring the Trouble Maker out in person. But I'm working on it. Its gonna take time and effort on my part, but its part of my progress...right there with getting me physically healthy.